'O's really suck

hahah

studying for too long gives me headaches,
more white hair than i can handle, backaches
and make me go mad!
hahah

i was studying in the library yesterday.
From 10.00 am all the way to 8.00 pm
10 whole hours
yup, i'm abso-bloody-lutely serious!

imagine if you will, sitting at a table,
full of people you do not know at all (and some were surprisingly annoying),
looking at books you don't really like,
with no one to talk to.
it would make the sanest person just go insane!

Diana did come to study at 12, but she left at 2,
so i was alone for the other eight hours
(thanx for accompanying me, Diana :))


hahah, there were small breaks though;
times when i couldn't stand looking at my books anymore.
oh, and i went to eat a waffle at 7.00pm.
Other than that,
it was all writing writing writing,
and reading reading reading.

This sudden burst of love for studying was borne of my guilt,
my guilt from not studying properly
when i've had the time these last few days.
And here i am, writing an entry...

am i CRAZY??!!
hahah
i just canNOT study at home.
I'm a weak-willed person
who gets easily distracted by all these
electronic spawns-of-the-devil crying out
"Fina, Fina, come watch ME, come play with ME,
leave those boring, word-filled books alone;
you need ME!"

hahah

i'll try to study later
i hope :P

God bless our poor mugging souls
peace (Y)

sy...sya...syar...syaraa...syaraf...
-_-'

hahah
it was uncomfortable when that happened.

so anyways,
haz, diana and i went to the rjc open house today.
not that i was having any delusions about going there.
i just wanted to see what they offered, ya'know...

it was okaay, i guess.
it seemed...nice.
people were, on the whole, a friendly lot.

oh, oH, OH!
guess what happened today?
the person who caught our attention at ri, like, a few months ago
we saw him today
actually, there're three of 'em
hahah
the bell-ringer, the food-server and the broad-shouldered person
hahhah

weird
we were walking through the interchange towards junction 8
and- lo and behold!- we met them at the traffic light
we'd only seen one of 'em at rjc
so it was a surprise to see the other two
we didn't know where the mrt station was, so we kinda... followed them there
hahah
stalkers ^.^
imagine if they had been heading somewhere else

anyways,
they were behind us when we were entering the gates-thingie
when suddenly i heard "sya... syar...syara...syaraf..."
my name was displayed boldly on my bag
i guess this is a consequence of that

what did i do?
i ignored them completely
(like i always do)
and tried to get the hell out of there as quickly as possible
i guess i won't be using that bag again anytime soon...

what's the difference between a caterpillar and a centipede?

i've just finished re-reading my bro's copy of the outsiders
i just love the book, man
emotions were raw, no polished presentation, just the thoughts and feelings of a fourteen-year old greaser

reading that book rought up memories of my other favourite book ever, walk through cold fire
by cin forshay-lunsford
man, i can't believe i lost the book
i really, really loved it
i'd cry every single time i read it

both were about teenage gangs
both were emotionally raw
i love that kind of stories
they get me bawling my eyes out every time
gosh
still can't believe i lost the book
my favourite of all time, hands down

i like kuih bakar berlauk =)

yay! a new skin!
i noe, there's too much going on
but i wanted to fit in alot of stuff

do you see the tom feltons?
hahah
i thot i'd make a tom felton as draco malfoy skin
i also wanted to put a "draco and the malfoys song" but there weren't any on radioblogclub.com
oh well
they're really amusing songs
my fave has to be "my dad is rich"
i also like "broomstick" and "your family is poor"
hahah
funny rite?

btw, the tom felton avatars at the bottom of this page are really funny
you shd read them one by one
i have another one of harry potter singing titanic's theme song
but it didn't fit in with the theme, so...
maybe one day i'll make a skin with a "stupid gryffindors" theme
hahah
or "ron is cute" theme
one day...

i spent sooo much time looking for avatars
initially, i couldn't decide on a colour, so i picked avatars of a great variety of colours
i have one big section on avatars in my file
all colour coded, and in each colour coded file are files in which specific avatars are arranged to fit in nicely with each other
and four files dedicated to draco, harry potter series and funny, merepek avatars
hahah
so organised so suddenly

i spent such alot of time on the skin
i had to make the dimensions fit in
i tried a few possibilities and this was the one which i was most comfortable with

green!
slytherin's colour
one day i'll make blue themed ones, then pink, yellow, grey, red, colourful ones...
hahah
as i said, one day...

...I've got a broomstick better than yours...
...my dad is rich, your dad is dead...
...why did your parents have so many kids when they're poor...
...i am so much better than you cos your family is poor...

i've just returned from mersing
and i'm proud to say that i have finally found an ambition
yay!
hahah
u noe, all my "joking" ambitions in the past were to become a window washer, sweeper, housewife (still is, but hardly an ambition), F1 racecar driver, bus driver, taxi driver, etc..

the only ambitions of which my parent wld approve are to be a physiotherapists (i dropped that idea... i'd have to touch smelly feet)
and a journalist (so much work, i'd need to be street-smart [i'm not])
and i've lost interest in that

i still want to be a photographer
but it'd be hard to get rich from that

so, back to the ambition i've found...
u noe
i like to stay at hotels
just the thought of someone cleaning up the room for you is nice
and i like the 24/7 air-con they provide
so i noe quite alot about hotels, from no-star to 4/5-star
no two stays are ever the same

mersing quite lacks quality hotels
or even small cozy ones for that matter
so i thought i'd open up a bed-&-breakfast
nothing extravagant, just something small-scale
14 rooms, three-four stories high, back porch with swing facing the sea, cozy, country cottage design inside, etc...
and i'm serious about it
i've begun planning, roped in a partner, a food supervisor...hahah

but i really am serious about it
this bed&breakfast would be my dream hotel
i'm modelling it abit like the now-closed-down Merlin Hotel in Cameron Highlands
that hotel was great, man
the first ever hotel in C highlands, it had high ceilings, a balcony for every room overlooking a beautifully tended gardenrich with colours of spring and a lush green golf course. The only thing i didn't like about it was that outside the rooms, and lobby, the corridor was like any old hotel...

and the room had proper furnishing
however, my bed&breakfast would have something extra
the bathrooms would have bathtubs, but not the ones cemented onto the ground, no
i'd have the claw-footed bathtubs
and satellite television
a tv room where an assortment of dvds would be available for the guests' viewing pleasure
and the breakfast would be all western, with some malay kueh

I WANT TO BEGIN THE HOTEL NOW!!!
but i can't, so i'm waiting at least ten years before i start
my brother's gonna be a banker, so i'd have some connections in the bank
getting my start-up loan would be easy

hahah
i'm getting out of hand here...
anyway, my half hour break from history is nearly over
so off i go...
come stay at my hotel in the future!
i swear it'd be the best in mersing! :)

long ago (well, up till sec 2)
i used to read, and re-read the harry potter series
cos it was so nice
and i had time to kill, and i didn't frequent libraries that much
every time i read it, a new detail would pop out at me
something i'd perhaps missed the last couple of times i'd read it
or mayhap had forgotten

how i missed those times
the 6th instalment of the series... well, i'd read it only once
yes, of course, shame on me
so i started to read it again yesterday
and now it's done

a new revelation (me: yay!)
well, the first time i read it, i did not read it as closely and attentively as i should have,
seeing as the book is that kind of book that warrants attentiveness to detail

in my haste to get the story over and done with,
to find out what the ending was,
and then to be able to rest my weary eyes
(it was 2 am when i reached the last chapter)
i had overlooked important stitches in the fabric which was the story

i had thought that harry was a twat!
for some reason, that was the impression i had when i finished reading that book the first time
and now i don't know why
and since i'll never find out why i had that thought,
i'll move on to another matter

u noe, i always try my utmost best to distinguish the draco in the book from the draco in the movies
recently, that became quite a chore when i started to read romantic spin-offs on draco malfoy, done by other people and such, on quizilla.com
they described draco malfoy as he was on film
and i found myself caught up in the little fantasies these people weaved
which was partly why i decided to re-read the 6th instalment
to get my thoughts on draco back into perspective

and i realised, that all these little fantasies of draco malfoy
are based on tom felton's portrayal of draco malfoy
hot as tom is, he is not draco malfoy
draco malfoy is a teenage boy with a pale, pointed face and white-blond hair
never, though i could be mistaken, have i read that draco was handsome
i have read that he was tall, but that and the blond hair, could be the only similarity between the real draco and the one on film

when i began re-reading the 6th book, i tried to do so without any prejudice or bias against the characters
and i actually felt sympathy for lord voldemort (though that twinge was gone almost instantly)
draco malfoy, though portrayed as a "foul, loathsome, evil little cockroach" in previous books, had actually shown his sensitive side in this book
his crying in the toilet, and his reluctance to kill dumbledore actually made his character an appealing one
his character has depth, and layers, and that is probably why, at this moment, he's my favourite character

there are alot of things i'm griping about with the writers of quizilla
other than the rose-tinted view of draco malfoy
but, of course, they are not that actual writers, and they can make their stories whichever way they want to
but, sometimes, it does get abit too grating on my nerves

like blaise zabini, who is popularly described as someone tall, handsome with brown hair and who is nice to harry's trio (or foursome, if u count ginny)
in actual reality (meaning in the book) he's actually a haughty dude who is hardly friendly towards the three/foursome
i don't think he's supposed to be a brunette... he is "a tall black boy with high cheekbones and long, slanting eyes"
probably handsome, but not in the way supposed by most quizilla writers
(draco's association with blaise does show draco in an almost positive light; he's not racist, just anti-muggle-born)

and then there is the spelling
there's the frequent mistake between "you're" and "your"
which annoys me to great heights
and spelling lucius as luscious makes me want to gag
as humans, it is inevitable that we err
but come on, at least learn the difference between "your" and "you're"
one is relative to "mine" while the other is just a shortened form of "you are"

well, i guess i'm done for today
i's a miracle if someone has read to this point
and for that person, i say congrats for making it this far
i appreciate it

till next time, then
toodles

p.s. dumbledore died! (crying:waaaaaahhhh!)

two posts in one day
wow

well, this time, it's to lament on all the bad things in my life...again

hahah
i know
it can get tiring, all this pouring out of my complaints about people and stuff
so, after i rant and rave about whatever it is that's bothering me, i'll dish out some happier stuff
okay?

the thing that's bothering me is my own not-so-dear bro
he's turned into an academic snob
would you believe how he looks down on people who go to neighbourhood schools... like us?
even though his own secondary school [SJ-freakin'-I]
rates lower than school-in-a-neighbourhood BPGHS?
where in the world did he get his head pumped up so big that it's floating so high above our heads and he's looking down his nose at us?

he was unbearable with his psle results
getting 240++
thank god i silenced him with a score 17 points higher than his

and then he was bragging about his JC,
about how bpghs churns out students asal boleh
students who go to neighbourhood JCs and don't go anywhere in life
like, who the heck made him the authority on school culture?
saying that his school's culture is better than mine?

he clearly didn't learn from the peribahasa, seperti buah padi, makin berisi makin rendah; jangan seperti lalang, makin lama makin tinggi

he should know that jika ular menyusur akar, tidak akan hilng bisanya
someone big or smart or whatever won't lose his status or rank or grade or whatever, if he were to be humble

now that that's out of the way,
i'm happy to report that we've already decided on a song to dance to for teachers' day
it's from kuch kuch hota hai
the mother of all modern hindi movies
the movie that got me stuck on hindi movies
and the song is... should i say?
let me just give you a hint
it's a scene with kajol and salman...

hahah...
anyway,
if u've read until this point,
thank you for bearing with me
my blog and i appreciate it


cakap siang pandang-pandang, cakap malam dengar-dengar
u never noe who's reading

teachers' day, prelims, all that stuff is coming on hard and fast...
am i prepared? i dunnoe

anyway, for the teachers' day celebration, i might be singing and dancing
woah
separately, of course
i have no idea what to sing since Fatin is the one deciding..
hmm... wat songs are good for teachers' day?...

dancing will be with fatin again and syaz and tipah and diana and nes
hahah
and a couple of guys
dancing to a hindi song
yeaahh!
bollywood rocks!
hahah

wo hui yi zhi hao hao guo....
i will also slowly walk away...

hmm... on 25th august RI is putting up some show, and haz wants me to go with her
shd i go?
cos if i go, diyanah goes

but
on that day, i'm supposed to have bio prac
and...
PRELIMS ARE COMING!!!!

aaargghhh
anyway, i'm here yet again to lament on all the irrational things that adults do

like, even if u're angry, can't u at least be sensible and think about what will work best?
because the way i see it, ur way, the way u insist on going,
is very likely not going to benefit us in the sense that we won't be able to do all the things we want to do (and would get to do if u'd decided on the other way)

i noe, i'm not making much sense
but all that was written is just to release my angst into the internet-ocean which u happen to be surfing right now
a way of anger management, if u will

and boy, do i seriously need anger management

i really don't like it when i'm serious, and people don't take me or my concerns seriously
i mean, i may look blur, but i do notice lots of things
especially when other people are busy doing things their own way
and when i approach someone, i really do expect at least the courtesy of listening to what i have to say,
and if i'm wrong, at least prove it to me why i'm wrong
don't just blow me off
like you are right

gosh

not that i'm ratting on someone
or that i mean offence
it's just that, respect for my concerns would be nice, no matter how blur i sometimes am, or immature
if my concern is valid, then it shouldn't be disregarded
especially when it concerns something important

i really liked those days when there were people who listened

i write this in total outrage against the adults of this world
no, not all adults
only those who do not listen
as of now i can think of four people who fit the bill exactly
now, i don't care what you think of my outburst of angst
because this is my blog
and what i say goes
and right now i feel really incensed
so nobody can stop me

the first person i would like to rant about
is "malvolio"
hah
the name she called a teacher long, long ago
now that name has come to bite her in the ass
people in my class,
you probably already have an inkling of who she is
for those who still don't know,
let's say "the english teacher" and she are connected
and she doesn't teach us that text
get the obvious clue?

i really, really do not like condescending people
people who patronise those younger than they
are egoistic
and think they're always in the right
in a sense, this person fits the name malvolio so perfectly
she is wrongly self-righteous
she thinks we're stupid, slow people who have bad memory
and are lazy
well, maybe she's right for the lazy part
but the rest, hah, we're onto her
we exact our own kind of revenge
we stand, staunchly united against her flamboyantly wrong character
and we laugh at her, not with her

the other three people i'm ranting about,
are in my family.
oh, wait, make that number four
yep, i'm angry against the rest of my immediate family
i'm not naming names and what they did
because that would be like doodling on my own face with coal

but i will say, teenage angst has finally caught up to me...
...three years late



p.s.i have no idea why, but i get so worked up whenever i enter english class
hmm, does this have anything to do with malvolio?...

what an extremely tiring week this has been...
gosh
except for the off days we had on monday and tuesday
no cca on those days

but the days after that, whoo~!
three consecutive days of going home late

wednesday: B&B day
got out of school early
arrived home around 2.30
slept like 15 minutes (3-3.15)
got ready, met diana, went syaz's house
went there
was ok, i guess
i liked what i wore
i like flowing skirts!

thursday: dead exhausted after wed, didn't go to school
went doctor for some problem
the medicine costed $40++
didn't have money, so went home with the cheaper medicines
got ready, came to school late for bali dance
so went only for malay dance
practiced till 5.30
then i went to geylang to collect the clothes
arrived at woodlands at 9.30
rushed to buy the makeup needed
got home at 10.30
slept at 1 cos i had stuff to do (like make my bro maggi mee)

friday: fun day!
woke up at 4 am
arrived at school ard 6.15
got ready
did makeup and whatnot
went hwa chong
i love the school!
i miss the school!
i wanna go back there!it's big and they had like water features everywhere
and auditoriums with air-con
and a free mike in an empty large room where we played with the mike
super big library with B&B stairs
dancing...
i fell like two times
wobbled alot
so scary
but the second time was okay
didn't want to leave the school
some other schools were there
like some nothing-to-do mynahs
who were catty
my god
talk about stereotypes

anyway, got back to school, went home, slept an hour
went back to school alone
since syaz couldn't go
met diana and soo min
i love studying in school at night
it's so much more productive than during theday with teachers and in classrooms

heehee
got home ard 9.50
so i'm still tired
but i have tuition and have got to go now
see ya:)

Zizou, Zizou, WHY?!

why did you leave?
where did you go?

your last game, and.... WHY?!!!
.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.
Zinedine, Zinedine, POURQUOI ? !
Pourquoi etes-vous parti ?
Ou etes-vous alle ?

votre dernier jeu, et.... POURQUOI ? ! ! !

.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.:':.

so i woke up one hour ago
and i found out the blues lost
which blues?
les bleus
and over the good ol' penalty shootouts


haish...
poor, poor thierry


World Cup is OVER!!!!
:(

[now my cheers will return to "ALLEZ ARSENAL!"]

world cup's coming to a close
the climax of world cup is nearing

man, emotions are running high
just this morning, someone i noe shed a few tears because germany lost to italy
even i have to admit, that match was damned surprising
in the dying moments of the extra time
just two minutes before the penalty kick-off would begin
italy scores a goal
and not two minutes later, they score another goal
immediately after, "phweeeet!"
game over!
goodness gracious, what drama

and early tomorrow morning is france vs. portugal
i was really surprised -but pleased, nonetheless- that france beat brazil
when the match was coming up, regardless of how much i love thierry henry,
i'd thought that france surely could not beat brazil
i mean, they were just world champions four years ago
but, praise be, france has made it
i'm so glad!

hahah
you know,
so many people have predicted that either brasil or germany would take the title
i bet alot of men are crying right now
banging their heads against the wall
considering suicide, even
all because of money lost on betting that brazil or germany would win the world cup
i've heard that someone even got a heart attack when they realised that brazil lost

it may sound like i'm gleeful that brazil lost
don't get me wrong, i like brasil
i have nothing against them
heck, in their other matches, i supported them
i was sad they went home
no more kaka to feast upon
oh! such a loss for womankind
it's just that,
if i had a choice between brasil and france, i'd pick france
i do hope france beats portugal

Je veux que la France gagne! J'aime les bleus ! J'aime Thierry Henry!
[i want france to win!][i love the blues!][i love thierry henry!]


hehe

i like this world cup air of festivities, u'noe
everybody feels like staying up together to watch the world cup
we're eating together, watching together, cursing together
it's all good

i'm one of those people who always support the underdogs
unless, of course, i don't like the underdog team
whatever match england is in, i hope they screw up and let their opponents win

oh well
my prejudice against their pride

i don't like how they're complaining about the heat
yeah, it's hot
yeah you're from a cold, wet, dreary climate
but wouldn't it be unfair for the teams from hot places to play in the cold?
wouldn't it give england an advantage if all the matches of all the world cups were played in the cold all the time?

so it's fair both ways, right?
what if one of the future world cups was in brazil or something?
blazing hot sun, there
is the england team gonna melt and complain like they're doing now?
just drink more water (like they're already doing now)
and stay off the alcohol
most alcohols raise the body's temperature

anyway
not everybody watches the world cup just purely for the love of the game
i mean, it's a great game and all, 20-odd men chasing after 1 ball and all that,
but seriously, sometimes it gets a little bit tiring
especially when a team is determined not to let the other team get a whiff of the ball by passing the ball around and not attacking

so what do we do when that time comes?
scout, of course!
hahah
i'm talking about scoping out the good-looking men from the not-so-blessed variety
mwa-ha-ha
a favourite sport of most heterosexual women, i'm sure
especially if you're forced to watch the game

and this season's choice of hottie?
well, darned if i have to choose one!
hehehe
btw, did anyone catch the netherlands vs. ivory coast match yesterday?
my favourite of all eye candies is in that team
(robin van persie~...)

hmm...

i wonder where i can get butterscotch ice-cream
i'm getting cravings right now

so these past few days, almost the whole family has been down with flu
sick season, i guess

anyway, i kinda forgot what i actually wanted to write here
so i think i'll just leave it be until i remember it later

...umm?

my cousins are in australia now
i'm gonna miss them sooo much
especially when raya come along and only two families will be raya-ing together

we sent them off at the airport just this morning
feels like a lifetime ago
yesterday
the whole lot of cousins and i slept together for the last time at my aunt's house
watched the ring
and went to the airport together in the morning

a whole lot of photo-taking took place
a whole lot of tears were spilled
unfortunately, none were mine

am i so unfeeling?
i dunnoe..
i think i have a problem expressing feelings
granted, i did cry alot in the car
and at home
I'M GONNA MISS THEM!!!
:'(

so sad...
well, i'm gonna see them next year anyway..
hahah
dream on....
but, who knows. dreams can come true

wait for mee.... i'm coming!....

heheee



two words: m.a.r.s. a.t.t.a.c.k.

i finally know what my kind of guy is my type

after carefully analyzing all of my crushes, celebrity and all,
i have finally pinpointed all the criterias that are similar in most, if not all, of these men

firstly:
they are usually taller than me
of course they are. i'm pretty short
anyways...

secondly:
they have long faces
usually
not all have that
but it's apparent, especially in bounce up and damian lewis

thirdly:
neat, not-long hair
seriously
i don't like long hair in men
they irk me
such a turn-off

fourthly:
smiley
i like men who like to smile
smile are nice
and so attractive
i don't really like the pouty, broody, moody kind of guy

fifth:
lean-muscled
i don't really like the all-so-bulging muscles on anybody
looks like a pin can pop them anytime
instead, i like long, lean muscles
well-defined is the way to go

p.s. i don't like bounce down any more
it happened so suddenly
hahah
i'm free....

you now, i've never been much of a crier
yea, i cry when i watch movies and drama and documentaries and all that
but i can't truly cry
i try to
i want to cry
i want to scream
but i can't
it's like i'm emotionally paralysed
an emotion pariah
emotion doesn't come to me easily

but there are other ways to get rid of all that pent up frustration
i hit stuff
i take a huge wooden ruler
and hit my bed
of all targets, i hit my bed
cos it won't get me in trouble
it's nearly as satisfying as screaming anyway

you know,
time... it doesn't stand still
people say time flew by so fast or
too slow
but it doesn't
it just goes on ticking
tick-tock, tick-tock
even now seconds are going by
you just have to be patient
sharp
and watch where time is taking you
or you might just be left behind

**+*+**+*+**+*+**+*+**+*+**+*+**+*+**+*+**+*+**+*+**

my last paper tomorrow
boy, i just can't wait
after that, i'm gonna go raid the library
and see what i can come up with
maybe i'll come across a gem
but i'm not keeping my hopes up
i've read too many books
i've no more options in the library
or at least, none in the library
i guess i have to go to emf or sth

i've been through many phases throughout my life
i remember when i went crazy over hugh jackman, brad pitt, damian lewis
( this really cute guy in band of brothers who has permanent wrinkles at the sides of his mouth from smiling) (looks like bounce up!)

and now, to present my latest celeb crush
*drumroll*
jason mraz!
yes! mr. az himself
i dunnoe
i saw geek in the pink
and i just fell in love!
hahah

what i liked about him in that video
was that i saw him without a cap for the first time!
and saw him interacting with people
and acting stupid
but cute stupid
and he smiled alot
[smiles are important to me, y'know]
and he boogied like saturday night fever
and he's just so cute!
and, putting that together with his voice
which sounds so cute,
you get my celeb crush!

hahah
anyway, he's like all the rest of the cute "slengeh"s
like adam brody, frankie muniz,
you know, that kind of breed

a totally different breed of hotties
who do not have to act cool
and are so wacky
but can still stay cute

aaahhh....
anyway, arsenal has another resident cutie
other than thierry henry, of course
[don't worry thierry, you're still no. 1!]
his name is robin van persie
he's 23
and way cuter than cristiano ronaldo
who has a thick neck
haha

i'm in the midst of mid-year exams
but as yet i have no sense of urgency to study
even now i'm supposed to be studying history
oh well
i'll start later...
way, way later...

today was the full literature paper
and it was okay! hahah
i feel so free now
not that i was laden with lit work over the weekend
i started studying only yesterday!
i'm so slack

yesterday's episode of desperate housewives
(which i watched this morning)
was so intriguing
especially when whats-his-name,
susan(whom i dislike)'s ex-husband,
defended bree
oh! the stuff of fairytales
a (maybe) handsome knight defending a defenseless damsel
against her fire-breathing bastard

anyway, i shoulda read my twelfth night book a long time ago
not that i don't read it,
but the teacher akways skips to the part that he/she deems relevant
that i missed what is now my favourite quote
ohwell

::O world, how apt the poor are to be proud. If one should be prey, how much the better to fall before the lion than the wolf.::

changed my skin.... again
but i must say, this one is quite nice
quite simple
no clutter
of course, i'm looking at it through mozilla firefox
so i have absolutely no idea how it looks like on internet explorer or netscape
oh well

i was taking the bus home yesterday
and spent the entire ride home looking at trees
i don't know why... it's just a little quirk of mine
i just look at the big sprawling trees lining the roadside
and try to find the most perfect tree for building a tree house
or just climbing or hanging out... literally

it's just for fun, you know
but you'd be surprised how many trees out there have potential
you see, the criteria for a treehouse-worthy tree
is that it's main branches are perfectly spaced from each other
and have like a 45degree angle or less

and trees for climbing
have different, distinct levels
that have just enough footholds
whereas trees for sitting on
have like three branches forming a comfortable seat
that has a base just right for a derriere

hahah
you must think i'm crazy
sounds like i've spent alot of time staring at trees
and i have
usually when i have nothing to do while my dad's driving
or when i'm in a bus

anyway
trees are not the only interesting things to look at while in a vehicle
the sky surpasses the trees in this case
cause it's always there
it can be moody
so no chance of you ever becoming tired of it
and it can be spectacularly beautiful
so you'll learn to appreciate life more

so you see,
nature isn't boring
it's not
it never was, and it never will be
you just have to know where to look

hey hey heyyy!!!
hahah
abit hyper today
i turned down a great oppurtunity to make my own perfume...
mistake?
who knows...
oh well

anyways...
i've had only___ what?__ 3 posts this year?
hahah
i was more concerned with creating my own skin
it's so much fun!!!
even though what i do is basically steal codes from other peeps
and edit alot of stuff until it becomes mine
it's not unethical
cos i don't really steal what they created
it's just that i don't know how to set up the stuff
when i have my own ideas
like this one here
before this, it was actually something about a...
umm...
well, something totally different
the point is,
i'm like the architect who just designs and knows what is needed and all that
but can't really build what he's created from scratch
get what i mean?

heheh
it's ok even if u don't
hey, did you notice this new layout?
it's cute right?
i just loveee lord sesshoumaru
he's so evil
but yet he cares for some people
like Rin!
you know, i also made skins for my sis
if u wanna see, go to www.budak-hingus.blogspot.com
notice the cute name?
i made that up for her
hahah


toodlesss...(it's not tood-less, it's toodle-ss)(harharr:]

you know,
sometimes i think that i'd be happy spending my days some place where there's nothing else but me and the sky and its elements.
oh yea, and food. and maybe some music.
nobody around to bother me, annoy me, obligate me.
no pressure; no future, no past.
just me and the present.
just me, looking at the sky and daydreaming.
just me with the clouds, the stars, or moon, depending on the time of day.

just me and my dreams.

but of course that's not possible.
unless i grow up, become rich, become a recluse in a mongolian grassland who has food automatically sent everyday.

that could happen.
but till then,
i'll have to steal little moments to look at the sky.

end of the third week of 2006
so far, i've had tons of revelations
and only one of them written down
the rest?
well, they were over-run by other new revelations
and so i forget them
until i come to a conclusion which sounds familiar
probably cos i've thought about it before

i think i have a minor form of A.D.D
why?
because i can barely pay full attention to anything
i get distracted so easily
my mind's usually flying off somewhere
and before i reach there, it takes off to somewhere else
haish

that's also one reason why i don't finish most of the work that i start
e.g. i 've learnt the first part of canon, nocturne, etude, turkish march, chopstix, largo, wedding march from a midsummer's night dream, petit chien, fur elise, gavotte and god knows a whole lot of other songs
the only song i've finished learning is piano sonata op.13 "pathetique" 2nd mov.
another proof is my guitar
i only took it up halfway
then forgot about it,
and took up keyboard

ooohhh
my messed up mind
i do enjoy day-dreaming, though
sometimes it's so enjoyable, i wish they were all true
no chance of that ever happening though
unless, of course, it had already happened before

come what may
i will love you
until my dying day

love that song.
am actually listening to it myself
*sheds a tear*

school's here, kemuning is over

i miss camp alot!!

hahaha

i loved the pasir ris site

it was so fun

like a family unoe



anyway school started like, three days ago

i feel like i've studied nothing so far

i've dropped a-math, since i failed that last test

so i now have a few free periods



like the one just now

us "dropouts" had no venue

so we stayed in class

and while mr peacock was droning on and on about graphs,

i slept

like a baby!

hahah

it was so nice having a siesta openly while the teacher was teaching



i'm a kid

i'm too young to be caught the middle of adults falling out

what am i talking about?

well, it's kind of complicated

but it's something about kemuning... teacher... rotan... don't like... racunkan tari melayu... hip hop+malay dance... rozzi... chacha... buang... osman... one big *SIGH*!



the gist of it is i mentioned something

that i didn't know i was supposed not to mention

but mentioned anyway at malay dance practice

because i didn't know

to someone who was included in the situation above

and i feel guilty

even though i wasn't told not to mention the thing

that i wasn't supposed to mention



haish

that's what it is

one big "haish"

yay!
i've gained about half of my voice back
so i can talk as much as i want
but i still can't sing...
aww...
hahah

i've learnt how to speak pig latin
it's really fun
and silly
and nobody knows wat the 'ell i'm babbling about

i know a bit of romanian too
hahah
example,'iubirea mea' means 'my love'
and um, 'si' is 'and' [ i think ]
'dragostea din tai' means 'love from the linden trees'

hahah
you've probably guessed where i got it from
"dragostea din tai"
a love song that sounds so funny
hahah

I'VE LOST MY V O I C E !!!
YES! seriously!
man, it kinda sucks
u noe me, i like to talk...

so [SYAZ]
if u wanna talk to me abt the camp
i guess u haf no choice but to tell me over ur blog, tagboard, e-mail, etc.
cos i can only afford to grunt over the phone
hahah

yay! i've passed my fifteenth birthday!
i still have no idea how to make my IC though
i read thru the instructions once
didn't understand it

just came back from my holiday in genting, port dickson and melacca last thursday
i tried so many new things

first, let's start with genting
a-ha-haaaa
that was where i acted naughtiee...
heheh
i threw "snow"balls at random people at snow world
was so much fun
although i feel a little bit guilty
all those poor people who suddenly got ice thrown at them
they looked so blur
man, i still feel guilty
hehe

hahah
and then there was the haunted house
it was so much fun!
there were only four of us - my two cousins, my sis and me
and we were so darn scared
thankfully there was another group of people
a whole big group of boys
heheh
and some were cute (of course i noticed!)

it was so scary in the haunted house
they mainly tried to shock us
and, believe me, it worked
my cousins sis and i were basically screaming our heads off in there
luckily the guys there were nice
they let us walk in the middle of the large group
they took care of us, asking occasionally if we were okay
they even didn't mind my cousins and i pulling their jackets from behind
hahah
one of them even held my youngest cousin (a young 10 yrs old)
as they walked

i can't even count how many times i fell down
once, my cuz fell on me on the stairs, then i fell on my sister
we sat there for god knows how long
the were ghosts scaring us between the railings and preventing us from going down the stairs
and as i was lying on top of my sister, i cld see the guys behind us waiting to go by

the highlight of it all, though, was when i stomped on the ghosts fingers
hahah
it felt so good
the ghost was tickling my feet while i was on my sis
i can't stand tickling on my feet
so i did the only thing that i could do while immobile
i stomped on it
needless to say, that particular ghost left my feet alone
hahah

another new thing i tried was archery
i tried only once lah
but i nearly achieved a bull's eye
hahah
i was so happy
my first and only time...
hmm... maybe i should join an archery club...
hahah
wishful thinking

i tried go karting for the second time in my life
in the exact same place i tried it the first time
didn't hit any tyres though
i came in first!
heheh
they even had a podium and trophy
so fun

unfortunately
there were some negative parts
my cousins and i were stalked in genting
twice!
two different groups of guys!
ohhh man...
so scary
i ran away
no, not literally "ran"
just walked as fast as i could away from them
one of my cousins was unfortunate enough to get caught in the middle of the two groups
twice!
i went back there to pull her out
but she couldn't get out
haish
so scary

[the meaning of the next two paragraphs are for me to know and for you the ask me about]
what this trip has taught me
is that i'm too young and innocent
i'm being left behind by time passing by
and people growing up
people change
i don't

i have my suspicions
of some things i was deliberately being blind to
i don't want to find out that i'm right
but it's just too glaringly obvious

peace

p.s. i made the layout myself
hee hee

I DYED MY HAIR!!!

hahaha...
bet you didn't see that coming, huh?
i did dye my hair, but only because of my million and one grey hairs
and the colour is so dark, it looks black!
so it's okay

and i got a haircut...

haiz...
i still haven't done a single homework...
i have... what? three and a half weeks left?
i'm getting by...

going genting this sunday... at 3 am in the morning...
hee hee! can't wait!
and...OooOH! my brother's coming?!
hahah... first time since we went to batam when i was in like, pri. 5...

my brother is so lucky (despite getting 6th place in sea games final 110m hurdles.)
he got his prom clothes for FREE! a friend gave it to him...
and so many other friends belanja him alot...
like the other day, his friend belanja him go watch movie (granted, his friend did win $10,000 in e sea games triathlon)

anyway, my parents are thinking of moving...
hmm... maybe it's time...

my nose is getting itchier and itchier by the second...
gotta go!

i have to say, i love the hospital
i mean, of course it's not fun when you're there for a really serious reason
but if you're there for a small reason compared to all the other things you go to the hospital for,
it's really quite fun

it was like a mini-holiday for me
missing school for two days,
and staying there for two nights more than i had originally planned

most things i need when i go on a holiday were there;
there was a kopitiam, and a really posh cafeteria on the eighth storey (where all the doctors eat)
and there was a book store(albeit a medical one) and a specs store
and two 7- elevens (one selling veggies and stuff)
and there was delifrance and polar

and the highlight of it all were the two stalls selling bags and one selling jewellery
it was almost like a shopping centre!

and the hospital itself!
it was so like a hotel
my father's room was a private one (seeing that it was a momentous occasion since my immediate family members are rarely admitted into the hospital)
and there was the air-condition
and even room-service!
you gotta love this place!

the nurses are great
they didn't scold me when they caught me playing in the wheelchair
or on my father's bed (the bed can move up and down on its own!)

and there was even cable tv
i think i'm gonna miss espn the most
(by the way, i watched the match between the perth wildcats and the brisbane bullets, and i gotta admit, i kinda haf a tiny crush on the captain of the wildcats)(hee hee)

haiz
now it's back to school
gotta face the music
wish me luck
hehehe

fin

yesterday i had a meltdown...
over what? over the ironing board!!
i was ironing the curtains when i ironed my finger
then i burst out in tears, stalked out, and vowed never to iron again (impossible, though)
i think that was the third or more time this year i ironed myself
(accidentally, of course)
i guess i'm just cursed
haix...
pity my (future) husband...
nobody's gonna iron his clothes for him...haha

anyway, tomorrow is raya!!!
yeay!!! finally i can eat in broad daylight!!!
hahaha
but i am cutting down on food

my house looks only a quarter ready
and i've got no kueh raya so far
none at all
zilch; nada, zero, kosong...
no matter
i guess that means other people will have to diet too
hahah:)

i've just finished clearing up my room
i'm tired
and it's only about 3 hours and 10 mins to buka
yeeaaaa!!!!

okay, i guess that's it
and, oh yeah,
HAPPY B-DAY TIPAH!!!

fin:)