Sad

Is there something on my face that says: "This person is not worth your time. Please don't bother replying to her"? Two people so far that have left me hanging - an old friend and a new one. And that can't be just a coincidence, can it? Somewhere along the way i must have become a poor friend, an annoyance in their lives, an unworthy person. I feel so sad right now :( I do try to be a good friend to whoever I meet. But of course I realize one true failing that I've found hard to overcome. I am lousy, so so lousy, at keeping in contact with people. Mostly because I'm not sure how to do it without being awkward, or seeming like a creep, or being an annoyance. I don't ever want to be a burden on people, or ever be considered a disturbance. That's why I find it difficult to b the first person to say, hey what's up, i miss you. In case they take my words the wrong way and think I'm overstepping my bounds as a friend, and reject me. And I don't ever ever want to be rejected, either directly or by way of being ignored by others. But there I go. Two rejections already in such a short space of time. There must be something wrong with me. Something must have happened to me to make me so loathsome. Well, it's possible that I may have always been loathsome to others, but to people who were once considered friends? :( But how do I change myself back to the person I was? How do I turn back time and regain these people's friendships? :( I don't know what I need to change... :((