The mouth is a mirror - we must watch what we say.

I find myself lacking in so many areas of my personal development. Like still not being brave enough to stand up for myself, and especially for others.

But when I think about the person I'm becoming today, compared to whoever I was at any point of time in my past, I'm much happier with who I am now. Sure, I feel frustrated and hopeless about so many things going on today, but I'd rather know and feel the things I do now, than return to the blissfully ignorant person I was before. Change is good, when you're striving for something better. I believe that you can't go too wrong trying to be a kinder and more compassionate person, even though you're bound to make mistakes along the way.

I'd like to blog more about something that's making me feel hopeless and angry, but I gots shit to accomplish today!

I'll just leave it here, on this one thought: You're still a bigot if you stand only on the side of the minorities and the oppressed that you can relate to.

Money grows on trees - but not for everyone.

I came across this post on facebook, by a guy whose cat fell 5 stories almost 24 hours ago. More than half a day after the fall, with the cat still bloody and hurt, he started seeking help via a cat-centric facebook group for the monetary costs of bringing his cat to the vet.

Before you (or future me, forgetful that I am) begin judging him/her now, the context is that he had to be at work all day, and doesn't have enough money to pay for a cab-ride to the vets, much less pay the vet to treat his cat. And apparently all vets (that he was able to contact) do not allow payment via instalments.

A lot of the comments on his fb post expressed concern for the cat and urged him to bring him to the vet first, and worry about the costs later. A pretty sizeable group derided him for waiting so long, and some even accused him of scamming people for money, because puh-leeez, who would wait more than 12 hours to get their cat to the vet, and who honestly wouldn't have at least $200 in their bank account for emergencies, or at least friends/family members who could lend them money?

And that's where I feel troubled. Because such comments are so oblivious and privileged that I feel sad for them and for the state of so many people trying to survive on this earth. Because it IS possible that just a couple of hundred bucks is too much for someone to cough up. And it IS possible that their circle of friends are unwilling/unable to help them with such an amount of money. Not everyone is lucky enough to have such useful connections and such healthy finances. That's why I feel sad for them. And I feel just as sad for those people who are able to remain blissfully unaware that such hardships exist for people outside of their social circle. Because it means that they are unable to empathise with the difficulties in life that people face. They look deride and insult and scold and look down on these people because they just can't get it. They're shallow and emotionally stunted on this end.

And I - I have been so fortunate my entire life, due to my sheer luck of the draw. Though I am not rich by any means, I am part of those lucky ones born to parents who were able to love and strive to provide for their child/children's every necessity.

Even when I was virtually jobless for several months, had less than $30 in my only bank account, and had to think twice and thrice for every item and every meal I had to buy, money was not a crushing worry for me. Because I always knew that I had a safety net to fall back on, that the family and acquaintances that surround me are able to help me if ever I'm in an urgent and desperate situation.

But the widening of my social circle the past couple of years have also widened my horizons and increased my self-awareness. Hardships exist, more so for some people than for others. And, to draw my line of thought back to the fb post I saw, I can understand that the cat owners might be too financially stretched to spare $25 for a cab, and at least $250 for the vet. Sometimes, even if you're a cat lover and you're trying your hardest to find a way to treat your cat, your circumstances just don't allow for you to do what everyone else expects you to do. Maybe if you skip work to bring your cat to the vet, you'll get fired from the job you desperately need. Maybe you're on such bad terms with your family that they won't give you any help even though you've asked them. Maybe you only have $20 in your bank account, and you're worried that the cab will cost you $2 more than you can afford. Maybe the vets that you can bring your cat to, after you finally finish working the job you desperately need, charge exorbitant fees for their 24hour service, and they won't accept payment via instalments even though you really just want your cat to be okay. When you're struggling to survive day to day and money is the biggest worry in your life, maybe you just don't have the capacity and capability to save your beloved cat's life, no matter how much you treasure and love it.

All I'm saying is, everyone's facing hardships in their own life. But there are some people whose hardships are too much for you to even imagine. So we should all try to open our eyes and hearts more in order to truly feel for others, and not just judge them based on the ease we experience in our own lives.